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It wasn’t like Kristen and I were BFFs, but her cell number was programmed into my phone. When I thought about it, though, I remembered I’d heard a few months back that it wasn’t exactly paradise in their beige colonial. Kristen was holding down two jobs to bring home extra cash.

You’re still getting irritated about the direction of the toilet paper or eating the last piece of pizza or whatever. Another friend whispered about a couple who split and their kids kept living in the house while they alternated weeks; a similar story involved switching off months. The following week, as I tried to determine if our town had a Weird Divorce Cluster, I casually mentioned to a friend at yoga about Kristen and Bill.

But there’s no payoff.” He was talking about sex, but I pretended he was talking about those special married-people moments, like the side-hugs we give each other when we witness one of our children doing something nice, like almost punching a sibling but deciding at the last minute not to. So I felt rather confident that the only time Thad would ever sleep on the couch was when I was bedridden with the flu and throwing up in a bucket. But their son keeps asking them why they never hold hands. A couple out in Wayne did the same thing, but bought a small studio apartment nearby where each parent stayed on his or her off-time. She volleyed right back—a separated couple she knew who sent a joint Christmas card, complete with a Sears Family Portrait of I knew—everyone—seemed to know someone who was involved in some kind of unbroken breakup. Like the couple in Abington who, two and a half years ago, announced to their friends and neighbors that hubby was moving out?

The next day, full of marital confidence, I stood on the school playground for pickup and, as seems to be required in such circumstances, chatted about what was going on around town. He’s so confused.” “That’s weird.” “You know what’s weird? Then there was the dad who moved out but came over every morning before the kids woke up to cook them breakfast. Fast-forward to now: They’re still living in the same house.

I am just one person responsible for two human beings. “We’ve all watched you over the past few years be so strong and amazing,” Kirsten said.